I nervously read this to a very special group of people at Hazelden in Naples, Florida and several of them asked me to share it with them afterward. It took me a while, but I hope it means something to you.
Years ago
I looked around me
and decided I didn’t belong
I exiled myself
to a harsh desert
where only the hostile cactus
and the venomous reptile
could survive
I trudged across the barren land
climbed towering dunes only to find
more stinging sand and blistering heat ahead
Until I found an oasis
a pristine pond
shaded by palm
promising peace
I drank from it and
although its waters were bitter
each sip brought sweet relief
I lingered here, oblivious
until I was full and realized
I had to venture out again
But as the desert took its toll
as mirages burned away before my eyes
and the scorching sun deluded my mind
I found myself craving the comfort of that oasis
And so I returned
No matter which direction I set out in
no matter how determined I was
to escape the desolation
I returned again and again
to drink from that tepid pond
and lose myself in the haze it granted me
I realized gradually
that the water was poisonous
Yet I returned
and I drank
Finally one of my brief ventures
brought me to the edge of a cliff
In the distance lay a lush valley
but directly below, a brutal drop
I longed for the waterfalls and shade of the valley
But the call of the oasis
and my fear of the fall
entrapped me
As I sat at the precipice
a beautiful bird landed beside me
It bore a message
from the people of the valley: “We see you there –
We were stuck there once too.
Come join us –
It’s lovely here!”
As I watched the bird spread its wings and fly away
I rose and returned to the oasis
but this time
I did not drink
Instead I collected fallen fronds of palm
and I wove them into wings
I looked to the sky from the cliff’s edge
and I prayed
I pushed aside my self-doubt
and I leapt
The wind caught my newly formed wings
and I soared
I hung on the breath of the earth
suspended by the power of my prayer
I glided into that promising green valley
Into the welcoming embrace of my fellow survivors
And here, my thirst is finally quenched
My soul has found peace at last
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